I let you in

I let you in
by Andi Lutz

You told me you wanted to be my friend,

So I let you in, I don’t let anyone in.

Even the people who are closest to me don’t really know me.

I let you in and you hurt me,

Deeper than I ever knew it could go.

The pain you made won’t go away,
No matter how many times I try to push it to the side.
The words you said go round and round, over and over.

I let you in and I let you know me.

And you told me that it meant nothing.

You told me you still don’t feel close to me.

You told me the opening up that I made myself do was not good enough.

And now I tell myself to stay closed off.

I let you in, and now I don’t want to let anyone in.

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